I was sent this by my friend Anna today. And I can only say "This is most certainly true". The author, after an extensive internet search, remains unknown.
It's winter in Iowa
And the gentle breezes blow
Seventy miles an hour
At twenty-five below.
Oh, how I love Iowa
When the snow's up to your butt
You take a breath of winter
And your nose gets frozen shut.
Yes, the weather here is wonderful
So I guess I'll hang around
I could never leave Iowa
'Cause I'm frozen to the ground.